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to be honest, i actually do not know exactly what morning pages are. i know i could just look it up, but i also don't really want to (see my last post about research; though this feels like one of those cases where it's probably worth just looking it up..…

at the current moment, i am on some level against conducting research for the purpose of writing my blogposts. why?

sometimes i worry that i might run out of creative juice if i choose to do one creative thing and not another, for example. i've resisted doing something like "morning pages" because i feel like i might use up all my words and not have any left for an act…

my fiancé and i started a podcast last week. the idea has been bouncing around in our heads for about a year, and we finally took the leap and recorded an episode, at the behest of an eager twitter friend. i was quite pleased with how the recording went!

when confronted with the fact that your actual, non-hypothetical skill level is different from whatever level you dreamed up in your head, you have two main choices of where to go from there. justify it away with disclaimers, refuse to look directly at the

the latest in "i create things with the love of my life": we started a podcast about language-learning!

i'm taking a short, intensive summer course in swedish, and it's actually going pretty well!

i started this blog in part because i dared to strive toward greatness. if i wanted to ever be a great writer, i'd have to put reps in. i'd have to really work for it. what inspired this was reading my dad's old blog. it's nearly lost to the seas of time…

i used to post like a madman on tiktok. that's the secret to not caring about any tiktok in particular: just post 80 million and no one's gonna see any of them. but i never really post on there anymore. so now instead of being constantly replaced by videos

who cares if my skin gets worse?

for a while i thought my problem with speaking is just that i didn't have the courage to speak. i mean, that definitely is part of my problem. it's just not the whole story. more specifically, i don't have the courage to speak unless i know what i'm saying

so aging just means my skin is going to get worse for the rest of my life?

i'm not sure what One Single Topic i'd like to write about tonight so instead i'll just write a little about each. let's see how it goes. today i had a video call with a twitter mutual. it's been ages since i've done that, and it was way more enjoyable and

moving countries means also moving churches. though we've been going to this new church every sunday (except of course the sundays when we're away....which has been three already—sidenote, mass in japan was amazing!)

somehow i've been able to remove enough friction to increase my writing output to a relatively satisfying degree. i blogged ~daily and reached 100 blog posts, and have over 40,000 tweets, and wrote an e-book out of my tweets. but i still have not been able

at some point, my swedish outpaced my german, and i've been thinking about why, while also deciding to put actual effort into my german as well. i technically lived there for a bit over a year, but with traveling factored in, spent a total of about 8 actu…

instead of just THINKING that i opened this page and am now writing these words. that'll do for my re-entry post

we moved countries this month, which has disrupted many of our normal routines. including, but not limited to: going to the gym 3x a week, me booking swedish tutoring sessions, and of course, writing this blog. that wouldn't be so bad, except that we're a…

i've published very few blogposts this month. i'd like to blame it on moving to a new country. or would i?

i erroneously thought that being in a better place now for my move to sweden meant that it would involve basically zero tears, in contrast to last year when i moved to germany and cried what felt like daily. but alas, moving to a new country inevitably in…

over the past year, my wellbeing has measurably increased as i implement healthier habits and spend time being happy with my fiancé. i'm no longer plagued by constant lethargy and migraines. curiously, i also get annoyed more often than i did before. the…

we moved to sweden, so the last few days have been quite hectic. our wifi turned off on the last day of april, and for some reason my cell service was downright atrocious, so for the remaining days before we moved, i was all but off-the-grid, save for the…

today i'll be modeling in a fashion show for the last time before we move away from berlin. my model bag is packed and ready to go and my stomach is slowly twisting itself into gentle anticipatory knots. my fiancé will be coming, and gets to sit in the re…

being home alone (for more than a few hours) without my fiancé for the first time was genuinely psychoactive. i enjoyed my time and was more productive and functional than i expected, but i also felt strange emotional echoes of the me i was before i met h…

last month, i wrote a post about my fascinatingly linear blog growth so far, joking that everyone should coordinate to view my blog approximately 1727 times in april—so the trend would continue—that'd be great. imagine my surprise when i log in today and…