Josh Goodwin

Had a spam: Hi Bus Shelter, This came up when our team was looking over your Google listing: “Blaby council need fix it up as it’s a disgrace.”

I used to wake up to the sound of the iPhone Crickets ringtone/alarm, you know the one that’s the sound of chirping crickets, so now the sound of cicadas engenders some stress.

Further to the Jake’s Cakes thing, I saw an ice cream van named Jake’s Flakes – a fine name, even though the van surely sold cones and ice cream as well as flakes.

Was late for a thing on Saturday because I thought it wasn’t until Sunday.

I was house-sitting in the ’nam (Fakenham) on and off for a few weeks.

Went to vote in the police and crime commissioner byelection.

Got some of that Berocca, the soluble effervescent multivitamin tablet.

Tried one of those exfoliating foot peels.

To Liverpool, where I stayed for longer than expected – given the railways’ advice not to travel in the hot sticky heat, ignoring their advice would have been rude and looked like I was unkeen to spend more time with my da.

Peter Bazalgette, the television executive and producer, is the great-great-grandson of Joseph Bazalgette, the civil engineer who pioneered London’s sewage system, and perhaps you can see where this is going.