exhaled and forgotten

If grief is the price of loving, then I’ll grieve you like 2008 summer nights — bumpy car rides peeing in bottles cool salty air and damp grass barbecue and coconut water prismatic lights strewn across the sky music from home-burned CDs worn out stereos I…

(Archival, November 10, 2025) Release us as two balloons at the ends of the earth and I’ll come find you We’ll meet again somewhere between the seagulls and trash fires If we were clouds Let’s hover over to your worst enemy’s house And we’ll hold hands as…

For some stupid reason I check the heart counters on these posts But I don’t know if you even read these Or if you even remember that I write here at all

I’ve been watching pizza reels online And I think, maybe you’re an anchovy pizza Delicious to me, but I know you’d hate it In my head I’m picking at the pizza like a kid Mommy, it has fish And olives And garlic Mommy I don’t want to eat it all in one go T…

I look behind me And it seems my shadow Has swapped itself with yours

I realized we stood on different mountains When you apologized for not being good enough I wanted good You just wanted to be enough

The first three days were like an exhale After months of cocooning All the moths in my chest But each day after that I coughed up sand That had crept past teeth and under eyelids When I thought I had clothed myself I lay on this shore numb as the cool wat…

Lay the bricks of the home we were to share And build yourself as the man you dreamed to be And marry my ghost and bear with her another With your curls and my eyes And late at night, drive my ghost around town To get chicken sandwiches and ice cream While

(archival, July 13, 2025) We kiss at the boundary.

I throw a lily on your corpse and bury you.

I herd sheep I round them up and they heed my command But they look at me at eye level And I feel like I'm one of them Perhaps my soft fur Is like the plushness of their wool And perhaps my strong bays Sound to them like familiar bleats And even still One…

Fingertips flit across the strings, palm tapping against the body percussively.

10pm, city wide blackouts.

Twenty-five.

An echo of my old self.